I don't know what to do, short of moving away. . .

I'm being stalked
by a
crazy woman.
 

Dear Kristine:

I'm being stalked by a crazy woman.

I didn't know she was crazy when I first met her.  She seemed like a normal neighbor. 

Then things changed.  My wife divorced me about eight months ago and ever since, I haven't been able to get this woman out of my life.

It started out small.  At first she invited my children to her home for cookies and milk after school.

My kids loved it, but it freaked me out.

I told my kids to stay away from her, and then she started sending me little notes and letters.

I ignored her, but she didn't quit.

After a while it got even stranger.

This last summer she stopped by several times in a swim suit, barefoot, asking if she could "sun" in my back yard.

I told her no, but she didn't stop coming around.

---

Lately she's been walking around her front yard in some crazy night-gown get-up.  I see her looking over here - trying to get my attention.

My sons are old enough to know what's going on.  Last night my youngest asked me if this crazy lady is "in love" with me.

I don't know what to do, short of moving as far away from this woman as possible. 

Can you help me??

Signed,
Ain't No Romeo
- - - - - - - - - -

---

Dear Romeo -
I have to tell you that this is an odd letter.  I don't hear, frankly from many men with your problem.  Most of my letters are from women who feel uncomfortable with the unwelcome attention received from strange men.

I'm a little at a loss -- - I've never heard of anything like this before - -

But I believe you. 

This woman is obviously a little out-of-touch with reality.  If you have, indeed, not given her any reason to think your family is her family, you do indeed have yourself a genuine stalker and a serious problem.

Here's what you must do;

1. Make a special visit to her home.  Do not go in the house, however - communicate with her at her door and tell her that you have been made uncomfortable by the way in which she is behaving.  Be specific.  Tell her you do not appreciate her scantily clad exposure.  Tell her your children are uncomfortable as well.  Be sure to mention that you have received her notes and find them disturbing.

2. Tell her to leave you alone.  Be specific.  Tell her what this means - say something like, "I don't want you exposing yourself to me or anyone in my family," or "Please do not approach my children or me ever again."  Be clear about your expectations.

3. Tell her what you will do if she persists.  Once again, be specific.  Say something like, "I will contact authorities if you disturb my family again."

Then, back off.

See what happens. 

If she approaches again, contact the police.

This woman is not posing a physical threat to you.  However, she is trespassing and disturbing the peace and you have a legitimate complaint against her.

I'm a little baffled by this, Romeo - -- and hope this situation abates.  Let me know what happens - and good luck!!

Kristine